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Nota Bene

 

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I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he or she handles these three things: A rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I’ve learned that regardless of your relationships with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life.
I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.
I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back.
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, i usually make the right decision
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.
I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

(Maya Angelou)

 


 

This is one of the many wisdoms of Maya that I found particularly expansive to our casual definition of love – forget dating, forget romance, forget diamond rings and fresh hydrangeas – love is everywhere, and it is seated gently on the little things in life.

 

 
 

Make someone feel loved today. Happy Valentine’s Day!

 
 
P.S. 7 ways pandas taught me to say ‘I love you
 
 
 


Stace

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via Chinasa Abiakam on Pinterest

 

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How to get him to become your personal mind-reader

 

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Start by telling him what you want. Why you were angry last Tuesday night, how you’re not asking for his solutions and just his ears, and what you want to have for dinner on Valentine’s Day. If you don’t know exactly what you want, just break the silence. Tell him all the choices you have on your plate. Let him speak his mind. Stop him from thinking you’re giving him the silent treatment for some mysterious reason. Choices aside, it’s probably not the best idea to push all the decision-making responsibilities to your man. You and him, it’s a two-way street.

Whenever he disappoints you and you’re all too tired to explain what looks like the most blatant mistake ever, think about the last time you disappointed him so much that he let out a big sigh. Yes, it’s one of those “Let me get some air” and “Can we talk about this later?”. We, unlike men, like to talk. The more heated we get, the more we want to scream, “Why can’t you understand? You’re supposed to get me!!” Men are a different breed. After hours of heat, they need to reset the logical parts of their brain, much like your computer needs to cool off after all the energy it has sustained. You will never realize this in the heat of the moment, but when you’re overwhelmed with emotions, a few rational thoughts can make huge amends.

Also, stop trying to make things seem obvious. What might seem obvious to you might not necessarily seem obvious him. Instead, clarify. If you want him to buy you a dress, don’t say, “That’s the prettiest dress I’ve ever seen!” Say, “I’d like to have that dress some day.” Rather than starting an argument about the prettiest dress the both of you have ever seen, let him know what is it about the dress that concerns you: You want to have it some day. It doesn’t matter if he thinks it’s pretty or you think it’s pretty. He cares about you, not the dress. Don’t make him care about the dress. You know you want it and you hope to own it. Say it like it is. Don’t expect him to know you want it by saying something that doesn’t concern you about the dress.

On your anniversary night, you’re lacquered in your most kissable gloss and divinely sculpted in a Herve Ledger. You were expecting him to kiss you, with tongue, good night before you slide out of his car, but he didn’t. You’re mad, you can’t believe it, you’re upset – but don’t fret yourself. If you’re so upset (and/or somewhere between angry and horny) that you can’t even, keep a quota of 3 unanswered calls and 3 unreplied texts. True, nonverbal communication is the majority (93%) of what gets said, but it doesn’t give you a license to expect him to do the exact thing you want him to do, done exactly the way you want it to be done. Even if you’ve looked the other way and gave one-word answers to show your discontent, you still need to verbalize exactly what’s on your mind, preferably as soon as possible. He may seem unaffected by all your efforts to look good that night, but you don’t know how hard he tried to control his stutters and shaky knees. It doesn’t help either that men can’t read body signals like women can.

So if you want it, just ask for it. Pick up his call, reply his text, and ask for that French kiss. Don’t let him misunderstand you, and don’t even begin to exceed the quota. The worst starts to happen when you pile up the rocks for up to a week. Weeks easily become months, months become years, and years become a lifetime. You don’t want to build a life of resentment, only to look back and see a mountain you can no longer move, all because of the darn kiss. And I know, the way I said it – asking for what you want – sounds completely unromantic. But have you got any idea how much of a turn-on is dirty talk to men? It doesn’t matter if it’s only the first anniversary or your 50th, or if it’s a dome or a megalith standing between the both of you – all you have to do is ask. Now’s the time.

 

 
 

Most important of all, learn to let go of all expectations and start the straight talking. Honestly, gently, and lovingly like a lady. Choose to let him know what’s on your mind as best as you can, because no matter how well you think you know your man or how well you want your man to know you, he’ll never fully understand you, even if he want to. As Harper Lee once said, you never really understand a person until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it. Likewise, you can’t, and will never, truly know what’s on his mind 99% of the time. Neither does his buddy nor his brother, and certainly not even you.

 
 

P.S. The truth about men and feelings.

 
 
 
 
 


Stace

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via Anna Bliss on Pinterest

 

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Last minute gifts: 7 things he actually needs

 

I’m guilty for giving something for my boyfriend fiance (still not used to the term) this Valentine’s, which you’ll find out what after the weekend. I always get him stuff he doesn’t need … like a black tea macchiato from KOI and Christian Grey’s tie. So here’s me bouncing off ideas for future gifts and a last minute Valentine’s gift for your man that he’ll actually use:

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☑ Sennheiser OCX 685i Adidas Sports Series in-ear headphones for when he’s hitting the gym
DELL 1TB ultra slim and portable USB 3.0 external hard drive for carrying his digital data everywhere (now he’ll think of you everywhere he goes)
A casual V-neck knit blazer in grey for him to throw on easily over anything he wears everyday
VMV Hypoallergenics pre-shave barber oil that contains coconut derivatives, for you to finally stop kissing a cactus
SK-II men’s essentials set for him to finally get and keep a proper skincare regimen
A Batman-shaped wall clock, to console him for the fact that he doesn’t drive a Batmobile
A weekend spa getaway for two to get some air in Ubud, because you and I both know he needs a vacay, no matter how short

 
 

 
 

So which of these are you getting him for Valentine’s Day?

 
 
 
 
 


Stace

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3-day Bandung trip: My life-turning weekend

 

Hey guys! It’s been a helluva ride in the past few days for me. If you follow me on social media, you may already know that I’m recently engaged :) THANK YOU for the prayers and congratulations <3

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This post is going to be really long (you’ve been warned), and it’ll partially be about how he did it, partially about the stops we made throughout our 3-day-2-night getaway to Bandung. You may skip right ahead to part deux: the places we went, but you can also read from the beginning till the end. Hopefully between my wordiness you’ll find inspiration from the cusp of our 3-year-7-month journey together. As to why I’m blogging about it, it’s because this is an important chapter of my our life that I want to keep alive forever :)

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10 holiday gifts for every man on your list

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Most guys are generally techies who’d go ecstatic if gifted with fancy gadgets. Well, here I’ve rounded up your last-minute gift ideas for the holidays that aren’t entirely about pushing buttons:

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TE3029 round skeleton watch by Ted Baker

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What it features:

  • Stainless steel band
  • Analog watchface
  • Japanese automatic movement
  • Water-resistant 50m

 

Why you should get it for him:

This will be his new favorite watch (so manly) and every time he looks at his wrist, he’ll be thinking of you.

 
 

Sony PlayStation 4 in Glacier White

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What it features:

Your brother/boyfriend/best guy friend knows this more than you do, obvs.

 

Why you should get it for him:

It’s the 20th anniversary edition of the classic console, so it’ll be extra, extra special for your guy.

 
 

Golf club bottle opener from Two’s Company

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What it features:

  • Brass/sheesham wood
  • Measures 2.5 x 0.5 x 7.5″

 
Why you should get it for him:

The minute I saw this item, I thought of my dad. He’ll think of me too whenever he uses this gift. I’m sure it’ll be the same if you have a dad who’s a serious golf freak yourself too.

 
 

SK-II Facial Treatment Essence for men

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What it features:

  • 90% concentrated with pitera
  • Menthol for that minty freshness you’ll smell on his cheeks after he’s showered

 

Why you should get it for him:

Because the man in your life deserves a leg up in the skincare department (Guys are, you know, guys. That’s why they need you).

 
 

iPhone 6 in Gold (unlocked)

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What it features:

Again, he knows this way better than you do.

 

Why you should get it for him:

Let’s face it – he’s been eyeing it for months and you just can’t stop hearing him talking about how slim and elegant it is. Now that it’s in his hands, it’s time for you to take the spotlight.

 
 

UA40H4200Samsung 40″ HD LED TV

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What it features:

Yeap, he still knows more than you do.

 

Why you should get it for him:

Don’t know what is it about big screens and clear displays, but give a man a giant TV and he’ll love you forever.

 
 

Blue short sleeve batik by Semata Wayang

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What it features:

  • Cotton
  • Front buttons and pocket
  • Navy blue batik print

 

Why you should get it for him:

Now he has something handsome to wear for weddings. Much easier to put on and much lighter than his usual suit and tie.

 
 

Flos beside gun lamp in Black & Gold by Philippe Starck

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What it features:

  • Die-cast aluminium with an overmolded polymer coating
  • Handgun body
  • Glossy 18k gold finish

 

Why you should get it for him:

Celebrate his machoness and ncrease his testosterone-pumping ego the moment he gets this. He’ll be showing you off to all his friends.

 
 

Everbest formal round-toe shoes in Brown

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What it features:

  • Leather
  • Round toe
  • Rubber soles
  • Stitched details

 

Why you should get it for him:

He can wear this on a casual date with you to a smart business attire without switching shoes … and still look hot the whole time.

 
 

FIFA 15 by EA Sports

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What it features:

Messi on the cover (it’s a status, like a supermodel’s moment on some women’s magazine)

 

Why you should get it for him:

Sorry, girlfriend. He might want to be left alone with the guys and his PS4 for months. But after that, he’ll always remember you as the marriage material.

 

 
 

Now it’s time for you to share: Who’s getting what on your list?

See all 12 days to Christmas gift ideas here. Here’s the helpers in the past week for your last-minute shopping:

 
 
 
 
 


Stace

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The only thing you need to consider to find true love

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Most of us grew up with the idea that picking mates wisely means running with a comprehensive checklist whenever we’re getting to know our suitors: Good character, stable job, etc.

As a result, we build ourselves up along the way in order to meet those criteria. When we’re full-grown adults, we want to be equal to the partner we idealize in our heads.

But have you ever considered who’s going to be there when all else is gone?

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Gifts for the geeky guy in your life

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Show some love for that guy you’re thinking about this Halloween:

Geeky gifts for geeky guys

 
Spider-Man vision mask that lights up when you put it on from Hasbro
MS355R walkie talkie that’s waterproof
4GB Darth Maul USB hard drive, muahahha
Trick or treat: 20-inch Hulk candy bowl holder!
60×30″ Gameboy beach towel by ThinkGeek
 Official DC superhero cookbook: Batpizza, Superburger, Wonder cupcakes, and more
Chewbacca wind-up to troll people :p
The exclusive Game of Thrones card game
Cute Buzz Lightyear cookie jar :) almost 10 inches tall.
Iron Man iPhone case
Anti-scratch video-recording glasses, 100% UV protected
 Sonic the Hedgehog action figure by Nendoroid
 The complete set of dragon balls
Cute ‘pop quiz’ mathematical clock
Collector’s edition: Optimus Prime action figure Platinum Edition
☑ Something else to troll people: Remote control shark to swim in the air
 


 
 

I want them all for myself too, especially the video-recording glasses. It’s a very Iron Man thing to do.

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The things you can do with the world in the palm of your hand …

 

 What are you getting for the geeky friend in your life?

 
 
 
 
 


Stace

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