04 | September | 2011 | Stacia Priscilla

PROSE

1. When you stare into her beautiful eyes, and you find it hard to think of what you really want to talk about, or just anything.

2. When you touch her and she responds just the exact way you want to be touched, and so you feel the chemistry.

3. When you give her a quick kiss and it feels really soft, and then look into her eyes again and you feel like kissing her again, only longer.

4. When she’s about to leave and you hug her tightly from behind and whisper softly in her ears.

5. When you are walking side by side with her and you move your head towards hers as close as possible, then you whisper sweet words in her ears, then caressing your head against her hers.

When time seems to pass so slowly every time you spend time with her that time seems to stand still, so you want to spend the rest of your time in this life with her.

Muchaluva,
Stace

BLOG

September 2011

Been three days since I left Jakarta and back to San Francisco again. Still on jet-lag and promised myself to sleep at latest 2am tonight. Looked back at my greeting cards collection from loved ones, and I brought them all here, store them safely inside my drawer just below my desktop, so that I can keep on looking at them whenever I lose hope with my homework. I know it sounds depressing, and there are lots of other people around the world suffering from worst-case scenarios unimaginable for us lucky people who are living in great conditions.

Whenever I look at the messages from these cards I remember to treasure the people I love most in my life. They help me remind myself the reason why I came thus far just to go after my dreams in the first place, even though you never know what you want when you’re 16 years old (When I first landed in the United States as an F-1 visa status), and plans change. Dreams never change, but plans do.

Here’s the update on my academic progress:

I’ve only got eight more classes to go until I receive my Bachelor’s degree, excluding the four classes I’m taking this semester. The future plan? Going back for good to Jakarta.

I remember very clearly how confused I was about the future when I just got here. Actually, I wasn’t confused. I was completely determined I wanted to break into the public and print, media, and other similar industries right here in the United States. I speak first language English, might as well put it to maximum use. My hobbies have been copying manga drawings, sketch chibi monsters and characters, and write, write, write some more. You can say that my actually hobby is to dream.

The question about returning back home after my college graduation has never been a priority, truthfully, after all these years. What made me decide to go back forever and ever was the last twelve months I spent, never going back to Jakarta for my vacation even for once, which I’ve always did every term break from school.

You never know what you got until it’s gone, it’s true what they say.

That feeling when you’ve forgotten how it feels like to have the people you love most around you, surround you, involved in your everyday life; and I meant the people you don’t just hang out with, but the people who’s heart you’re closest to.

And the most important people in my life is my family. I know, sounds cheesy. But that’s the truth.

My dream is still the same: Making a family, or reuniting my family in some way. Whatever skill I have, I want to use it. The world is merely a playground for me to flounce around the lands and seas, explore new ways to come fly back home, and build the strongest possible foundation for a family, just so you’ll always have a place to run to.

Maybe the world is too big to venture upon. And I’m only as far away from Jakarta as San Francisco. The further away you go from the place you come from, the more you forget who you are and what love feels like – that’s what I’ve learned last year.

I remember for my 18th birthday, three years ago from now, one of my best friends, one who’s not the kind to send gifts or give surprises to people, sent me a present that arrived under my doorstep when I came back home from school. There’s a greeting card that came along with it:

I had a big smile on my face – this may not be the first time I’ve known someone else who knows me better than I know myself, but at that moment, I was awestruck by the birthday surprise, though more surprised by the knowledge he has about me (“I don’t know what to say anymore because the card said it all!”), after all these years, and the right message he sent to me so that I could go on with my life the right way.

“You realized that you not only have ordinary luck but you have super extra-ordinary luck. So don’t waste it, give it to others too.”

I had a previous post on luck, and I find it intriguing now that I was talking about how important my family was to me, also in that post. This comes back to what my friend said (with the “Your Best Friend” signoff) on the card: “God will guide you the truth that you’re searching now.”

And that may be the reason why I’m in the business of truth-seeking today. Amidst the swarming eisegeses people generate everyday, the world out there is just a myriad of facts and information to analyze, criticize, and resolve. It’s adventurous, though dangerous at times, but just the perfect gift for one little moxie to dream on.

A surprise gift from my lovely boyfriend before departing Jakarta. The girl with the pink sleeve, that sounds like a very familiar idea. See below picture.